User Profile

Hey there, Hogwarts!

I'm Zacharias Smith (Zach to all of you decent sort) and, contrary to the belief of Potter SOME of you, I am not a total prick. Ernie's the prick.

I am a halfblood, and of no known relation to the Pureblooded Wizarding family Smythe. It would be odd if I were. I would be related to Hannah...
No, as it turns out, my mum's from this obscure like directly descended from Helga Hufflepuff, and my dad's a Muggle sanitation worker ufologist. Interesting combination, I know.
But enough of my shameful patrilineal heritage. I've adopted some traits of the Hufflepuff line, though not the name. See my blonde hair? Direct from Helga herself. I promise. Blonder than anyone else's at this bloody school, anyways.

So. Hannah and Justin are my best friends, though as a rule I don't really befriend girls. Hannah just came with Justin, they were like a package deal. And she's a lovely girl, one of the guys, really. Helps that the three of us have had many a late-night conversation over firewhisky butterbeer about girls and the like.
Pity Hannah's not straight, though, she's completly shaggable.

I'm not bent. I'm straight, and any rumors you've heard about me having a crush on a bloke are COMPLETELY UNTRUE! Especially in the case of Potter. I do not, I repeat, NOT fancy him. Anyways, I've shagged more girls than Hannah. That's gotta mean something.

I don't fancy Padma Patil, either. I promise. I am completely uninterested in the two of them- Padma and Potter, that is. Any dreams I have involving either of them and me in a personal situation is a direct result of the Death Eaters messing with my brain.
On the other hand, Ginny, I love you. You're a fabulous girl, it's a pity I don't fancy you. Will you be my very second female friend?

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